Comming Soon!

I have written a short story for my creative writing class. I will post it once I edit my dialog in it (because it isn't very good right now). I will probably post it in a week or so!

:] Deana

An Ode To Fall :]

It's fall once more as summer leaves turn red,
Brilliant colors across a changing world,
We slay orange bodies, scoop out all in sight,
Our glowing pumpkins cast their ghoulish light,
With glitter wings and wands or witches hats,
Our colorful costumes set out tonight,
The many mazes getting lost in corn,
and hayrides fill our autumn days with joy,
On chilly evenings filled with icy scorn,
A mug of steaming cider warms my toes,
It's time for giving thanks and tasty feasts,
of pumpkin pies and candied apples red,
It's time for overcoats and warm scarves too,
And boots with tights and more fun things to do.

Do You Remember?

Do You Remember?
Remember that time,
we armed ourselves with misguided lies,
ready to bring destruction upon the innocent.

Do You Remember?
Remember our wounds,
as we dressed them and set out,
ready for more of the Devil's work.

Do You Remember?
Remember our tears,
upon seeing the destruction,
and realizing sometimes we aren't right.

Do You Remember?
Remember the blood,
as we picked up each marred, red-skinned body,
to lay them in a glorified heap,
and felt sorrow at the damage we caused.

Do You Remember?
Remember our hands,
as we washed them again and again,
continuously again,
as if it somehow could remove our constant guilt.

Return

Moonlight on my windowpane,
The scent of you always the same,
The frigid cold whispers icy death,
over my shivering body.

How I long for your return,
Your warmth that devours me,
Your kiss that sends shock waves down,
to my nearly frostbitten toes.

You,
You,
Oh why must you go?

Return quickly silent lover,
for winter continues on while you're gone,
And you know,
I cannot take the cold,
So return again,
to leave again,
and to return.

Will You Dare?

The scent of your skin lingers here in this room,
as if your presence had never parted,
I can still feel your fingers tangled up in mine,
Who would have known we would end up like this,
after all out tiresome fights and lonely nights,
to then embrace in true lover's kiss.

It's not how perfect you always seem to look,
when your eyes with something deeper than fondness,
are looking back at me,
or even the way I cover up my face,
in all its imperfections.

It's not about the days,
hours,
minutes.
seconds.

But I count them religiously until I see you again,
Infatuation? Obsession?
Devoted attention? Will you stay?
Or will you dare?

Dare to lost that close connection,
like you did that once,
with an unanswered call,
and the next time,
again and again,
never ceasing to end.

But I can't lose you,
I won't, I can't, I refuse,
Don't try and diffuse this flame,
You were to blame,
But not again,
and again,
again.

Falling To Pieces

The distance is ripping,
Tearing my heart,
I'm trying to keep myself together,
But I'm falling apart.

The miles are overwhelming,
Each city you pass is killing me,
I want to run after you,
Why do you have to leave?

I need your touch,
Your thirty minute distance,
Your arms around me,
Your comforting glances.

I don't want to give up,
I want to carry on,
Two months is short,
But the journey is long.

I'm afraid and scared,
Don't know what to do with myself,
I need your constant support,
Or I can't make it through this hell.

Soon

It's ripping,
And tearing,
Pulling at the seams,
And my head is spinning,
My heart- it screams,
Screams for you to be right here,
Two months isn't long,
But it feels like a year,
And I miss you,
I need you,
I don't do well on my own,
Please come back home,
Soon.

Please Stay

Sweet serendipity,
Oh remarkable boy,
The hold you have on me,
I am overjoyed,
But the question engraved in me,
Still lingers,
In the back of my ever doubtful,
And wandering mind,
Am I ready to fall again?

Fall to another one's grasps,
Left to the fate of those incandescent eyes,
That could either be the key,
To my euphoric wonderland,
Or a hell of a demise.

I am easily twisted up in one's cleverly crafted words,
They are played throughout in my mind,
As if they were original penned by him,
And who knows maybe, quite possibly, they are.

But oh,
He is fine,
And I do find that I unwind,
Deep in the grasps of his comforting arms.

Could this possibly lead me astray?
From my sweet tooth's possible decay,
Of this pure bliss that seems endless,
What happens if it should disappear?
I suppose I'll be left with a cavity,
Far too soon for the young spirit,
Of these short but drawn out years.

Can I afford to be in such a mess?
For his touch seems worth all the rest,
His smile and persuasive smile,
Captivates me,
The butterflies inside.

Does he know I feel like this?
I do believe he does,
And if I had it my own way,
He would not leave.

Please stay.

She Is One Bodacious Babe :)

So today in Biology we started watching Fern Gully! We are watching the second half tomorrow. (I'm pretty excited!) Anyways it is great because it made me laugh.

Favorite lines of the movie (so far!):

Zach: "No no, cool means hot."

Chrysta: "What?"

Zach: "Yeah. You know, bodacious, bad, tubular.."

Batty: "Awesome use of the language dude." (Said sarcastically*)

Zach: "As in.. you are one bodacious babe." (Said in some "cool guy" manner)

Chrysta: "And that's good, I mean, cool."

Zach: "Yeah, we're communicating now."

Chrysta: "Tubular.."

HAH! LOVE IT :) peace, love, I'm outta here till later :D

Interesting way to introduce yourselves don't you think? Hehe :)

Trippy Music Video! Hah.

So I have been on a desperate search to find this really trippy music video that I saw a month or so ago but could not remember what it was called! It was driving me crazy. I finally about after like 2 days remembered two of the words out of the title. I searched it on youtube and it came up as the first song! Success! So here it is in all its trippy glory :) Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1F8izLoE8U

We Gather Jars

I have many nice jars,
All sparkling in a row on my shelf,
Lined up like the books above them,
Each kept safely out of harm’s way,
With no intentions on returning them,
These jars are not mine,
These jars have been stolen,
The culprit- none other than I,
Deviously I took one by one,
Thinking the glass would always sparkle and thrive,
My collection started scarce,
It then began to grow,
For my shelf would be quickly filled,
“This one looks good” I thought,
As I received my very first jar,
Until things went amiss,
I hurried to gather more,
Greedily I thought, “Maybe this one will do,
Ah, Indeed it looks better”,
However, this one was also askew,
My desire sought out another,
My shelf was slowly losing space,
I stepped back to take a look,
At all my pretty jars I’d obtained,
All neatly row by row,
I was terribly shocked,
When I realized what I’d done,
Each jar was filled with precious life,
Still pumping it’s fresh, red blood,
I had plundered so many,
Brought them destruction and strife,
I had bought out each one of their jars,
At any risky price,
I felt so sad for all those jars,
Wishing I could give them back,
And panic set in when I scanned the shelves,
And could not find my own,
The jar that had my name on it,
With a gold, glittery pen,
Was nowhere to be found,
And I ‘d give anything for my jar,
If it only could be done.

Make-over & A New Poem

So actually I didn't go and delete my other blog but I don't know how much I'll be posting on there anymore. Or if I change my mind and actually do delete it. Oh and I finally wrote a new poem. It was a good way to get out what I was feeling. I haven't been really able to understand God's hand in all of it. It still doesn't make sense to me and it's still really hard to deal with since the knowledge is so fresh in my mind. Anyways more later and here it is! (The poem that is)

"Frustration"
I have some anger,
So much pain bottled up,
Should I release it?
Or save it for something else?

Why do we have to suffer?
Why is this world messed up?
Why am I the one to deal with this?
The one that wants to give up.

I want to punch a wall,
Or scream at the top of my lungs.
I want to let go of this hurt,
But it's my thriving drug.

Drug that numbs my bitterness,
Am I cynical?
Maybe I am,
I want to jump off the edge,
Just to feel alive again.

Thought my blog needed an long overdue makeover! :)
more to come latah gatah!

-Peace, Love & Baby Ducks :)

Updates!

So I'm gonna close down my other blog I think and journal on here too as well as still posting poetry. But anyways here is what's new I guess. I love this website called Stumble Upon because it is great and I've found some neat stuff like: www.hellopoetry.com

Oh and I also love this website called TED! It's really neat so I think you should check it out. It's quite wonderful.

Anyways other than that, everything else has been basically the same. Wake up, school, eat, more school, eat, homework, sleep (maybe). Repeat. Blah I'm so interesting. I haven't had much time for anything else lately which stinks because I miss my best friend. ARG! <-- hehe. I haven't hung out with Becca Wilson in forever. I miss her like crazy and this weekend is booked except for Sundays (which on Sunday she can't usually hang out = frowny face). So I'm hoping we can hang out soon. It's making me sad not being able to have time to hang out. I'm gonna call her tonight. I need that closeness back, that reconnection because it is really important to me. OH and... I finally made a decision! Not gonna cheer next year. Yep not gonna do it. It's not worth all the stress, bad grades, bad GPA, tiredness, crankiness and putting up with people that either offend me, are rude to me, or push the right buttons on me to where it takes away from me enjoying the game. And my coaches don't seem to like me. I also want to focus more on my schoolwork, art and literature. Yep. There's that.

Anyways a few pics of good memories of last time I hung out with Becca! She's so pretty. I love my best friend.

I'm So Very Sorry

To my dearest and loving dad,
An apology more than deserving,
To say how deeply sorry I am.
For the rebellion I have had,
For my anger and my bitterness,
For pushing you away,
For all the times I've hurt you,
Without understanding your pain,
We've both been hurting for a long time,
And you by far more than me,
I never have hated you,
It was just my cry of being lonely,
I'm sorry for my defensive side,
And always putting up a fight,
I'm sorry for the hurt I've caused,
I only want to now make things right,
I know sometimes you can't even look at me,
I can hardly blame you,
I hope you'll except my apology,
I mean it from the depths of my heart,
No matter what we've been through,
I admire you for your strength and heart,
And I deeply love you.

I Am An Island & She Is Only A Dolphin

She doesn't like to see a frown,
She only accepts a smile,
But I can't help it if I frown,
More than once in a while.

She doesn't like any bad words,
Not even ones like "crap",
But I can't help that we're not the same,
Maybe I should rap?

She doesn't understand me half the time,
She only knows herself,
But I can't help that I am different,
Because I am myself.