Please Stay

Sweet serendipity,
Oh remarkable boy,
The hold you have on me,
I am overjoyed,
But the question engraved in me,
Still lingers,
In the back of my ever doubtful,
And wandering mind,
Am I ready to fall again?

Fall to another one's grasps,
Left to the fate of those incandescent eyes,
That could either be the key,
To my euphoric wonderland,
Or a hell of a demise.

I am easily twisted up in one's cleverly crafted words,
They are played throughout in my mind,
As if they were original penned by him,
And who knows maybe, quite possibly, they are.

But oh,
He is fine,
And I do find that I unwind,
Deep in the grasps of his comforting arms.

Could this possibly lead me astray?
From my sweet tooth's possible decay,
Of this pure bliss that seems endless,
What happens if it should disappear?
I suppose I'll be left with a cavity,
Far too soon for the young spirit,
Of these short but drawn out years.

Can I afford to be in such a mess?
For his touch seems worth all the rest,
His smile and persuasive smile,
Captivates me,
The butterflies inside.

Does he know I feel like this?
I do believe he does,
And if I had it my own way,
He would not leave.

Please stay.

She Is One Bodacious Babe :)

So today in Biology we started watching Fern Gully! We are watching the second half tomorrow. (I'm pretty excited!) Anyways it is great because it made me laugh.

Favorite lines of the movie (so far!):

Zach: "No no, cool means hot."

Chrysta: "What?"

Zach: "Yeah. You know, bodacious, bad, tubular.."

Batty: "Awesome use of the language dude." (Said sarcastically*)

Zach: "As in.. you are one bodacious babe." (Said in some "cool guy" manner)

Chrysta: "And that's good, I mean, cool."

Zach: "Yeah, we're communicating now."

Chrysta: "Tubular.."

HAH! LOVE IT :) peace, love, I'm outta here till later :D

Interesting way to introduce yourselves don't you think? Hehe :)

Trippy Music Video! Hah.

So I have been on a desperate search to find this really trippy music video that I saw a month or so ago but could not remember what it was called! It was driving me crazy. I finally about after like 2 days remembered two of the words out of the title. I searched it on youtube and it came up as the first song! Success! So here it is in all its trippy glory :) Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1F8izLoE8U

We Gather Jars

I have many nice jars,
All sparkling in a row on my shelf,
Lined up like the books above them,
Each kept safely out of harm’s way,
With no intentions on returning them,
These jars are not mine,
These jars have been stolen,
The culprit- none other than I,
Deviously I took one by one,
Thinking the glass would always sparkle and thrive,
My collection started scarce,
It then began to grow,
For my shelf would be quickly filled,
“This one looks good” I thought,
As I received my very first jar,
Until things went amiss,
I hurried to gather more,
Greedily I thought, “Maybe this one will do,
Ah, Indeed it looks better”,
However, this one was also askew,
My desire sought out another,
My shelf was slowly losing space,
I stepped back to take a look,
At all my pretty jars I’d obtained,
All neatly row by row,
I was terribly shocked,
When I realized what I’d done,
Each jar was filled with precious life,
Still pumping it’s fresh, red blood,
I had plundered so many,
Brought them destruction and strife,
I had bought out each one of their jars,
At any risky price,
I felt so sad for all those jars,
Wishing I could give them back,
And panic set in when I scanned the shelves,
And could not find my own,
The jar that had my name on it,
With a gold, glittery pen,
Was nowhere to be found,
And I ‘d give anything for my jar,
If it only could be done.

Make-over & A New Poem

So actually I didn't go and delete my other blog but I don't know how much I'll be posting on there anymore. Or if I change my mind and actually do delete it. Oh and I finally wrote a new poem. It was a good way to get out what I was feeling. I haven't been really able to understand God's hand in all of it. It still doesn't make sense to me and it's still really hard to deal with since the knowledge is so fresh in my mind. Anyways more later and here it is! (The poem that is)

"Frustration"
I have some anger,
So much pain bottled up,
Should I release it?
Or save it for something else?

Why do we have to suffer?
Why is this world messed up?
Why am I the one to deal with this?
The one that wants to give up.

I want to punch a wall,
Or scream at the top of my lungs.
I want to let go of this hurt,
But it's my thriving drug.

Drug that numbs my bitterness,
Am I cynical?
Maybe I am,
I want to jump off the edge,
Just to feel alive again.

Thought my blog needed an long overdue makeover! :)
more to come latah gatah!

-Peace, Love & Baby Ducks :)

Updates!

So I'm gonna close down my other blog I think and journal on here too as well as still posting poetry. But anyways here is what's new I guess. I love this website called Stumble Upon because it is great and I've found some neat stuff like: www.hellopoetry.com

Oh and I also love this website called TED! It's really neat so I think you should check it out. It's quite wonderful.

Anyways other than that, everything else has been basically the same. Wake up, school, eat, more school, eat, homework, sleep (maybe). Repeat. Blah I'm so interesting. I haven't had much time for anything else lately which stinks because I miss my best friend. ARG! <-- hehe. I haven't hung out with Becca Wilson in forever. I miss her like crazy and this weekend is booked except for Sundays (which on Sunday she can't usually hang out = frowny face). So I'm hoping we can hang out soon. It's making me sad not being able to have time to hang out. I'm gonna call her tonight. I need that closeness back, that reconnection because it is really important to me. OH and... I finally made a decision! Not gonna cheer next year. Yep not gonna do it. It's not worth all the stress, bad grades, bad GPA, tiredness, crankiness and putting up with people that either offend me, are rude to me, or push the right buttons on me to where it takes away from me enjoying the game. And my coaches don't seem to like me. I also want to focus more on my schoolwork, art and literature. Yep. There's that.

Anyways a few pics of good memories of last time I hung out with Becca! She's so pretty. I love my best friend.

I'm So Very Sorry

To my dearest and loving dad,
An apology more than deserving,
To say how deeply sorry I am.
For the rebellion I have had,
For my anger and my bitterness,
For pushing you away,
For all the times I've hurt you,
Without understanding your pain,
We've both been hurting for a long time,
And you by far more than me,
I never have hated you,
It was just my cry of being lonely,
I'm sorry for my defensive side,
And always putting up a fight,
I'm sorry for the hurt I've caused,
I only want to now make things right,
I know sometimes you can't even look at me,
I can hardly blame you,
I hope you'll except my apology,
I mean it from the depths of my heart,
No matter what we've been through,
I admire you for your strength and heart,
And I deeply love you.

I Am An Island & She Is Only A Dolphin

She doesn't like to see a frown,
She only accepts a smile,
But I can't help it if I frown,
More than once in a while.

She doesn't like any bad words,
Not even ones like "crap",
But I can't help that we're not the same,
Maybe I should rap?

She doesn't understand me half the time,
She only knows herself,
But I can't help that I am different,
Because I am myself.

For You I Fell

You are kind and true,
I've fallen hard for you,
Your soothing words,
A comfort to my soul,
Your love is so unique,
You're more valuable than gold,
A glorious treasure in which I hold,
Your my greatest weakness,
My love I cannot withhold,
For I love you far too much,
You're everything and more,
It's all I have for you to take,
And nothing would make me happier,
Than forever being with you,
Because I know my love,
Is a mutual love,
For you truly love me too.

Third song I've written but sadly I don't remember the tune I made up to it :(

Verse One:
You stole a vital piece of me,
That pumps my blood endlessly,
That gives my soul wings to fly,
Your my demise and alibi,
So sweet to the touch on the outside,
But burns my fragile hands,
That slowly weather and dry,
From lack of another's warm hands to hold,
I used to be pure sparkling gold

Chorus:
A tragedy we'll always be,
Of intricate simplicity,
Broken hearts and shattered wings,
A kiss from you reviving me,
From a tattered and torn eternity

Verse Two:
You smolder me with one look,
You offered your heart in which I took,
Am I consuming your heart too?
Just because you are my glue,
To carve your heart like mine was done to me.
No, it's not true, this cannot be

Chorus:
A tragedy we'll always be,
Of intricate simplicity,
Broken hearts and shattered wings,
A kiss from you reviving me,
From a tattered and torn eternity (2x)

Among The Leaves

Second song I've written. It's sarcastically depressing haha. Hope you like it :)

Verse One:
Pick me up from where I lie,
The cold wind blows and the lilies sigh,
A place from home,
My heart it sings,
And darling, you're always here.
Haunting my dreams, And so I must sing...

Chorus:
La la la, la la la,
La la la, la la la,
La la la la la la,
La la la, la-aah,

La la la, la la la,
La la la, la la la,
La la la la la la,
La la la-aah

Verse Two:
Fill my heart with things I dream,
Although you tell me we are not to be,
You're holding her,
My head's pounding,
And darling, your presence here,
Still haunts me, And so I must scream...

Chorus:
La la la, la la la,
La la la, la la la,
La la la la la la,
La la la, la-aah,

La la la, la la la,
La la la, la la la,
La la la la la la,
La la la-aah

Bridge:
Now I sit here,
Among the leaves,
They weep for me,
I continue to sing....

Chorus:
La la la, la la la,
La la la, la la la,
La la la la la la,
La la la, la-aah,

La la la, la la la,
La la la, la la la,
La la la la la la,
La la la-aah... (2x)

Rebellious Sinner

I lift my hands up,
They're worn from defeat,
Acts of rebellion,
Are poisoning me,
My blemished hands,
None want to see,
A disgrace to the one,
Who wants to heal me,
I am numb at broken promises,
Disgusted in my weakness,
The dark one's plots are relentless,
They harbor upon my laddened soul,
Of imperfection and sin untold.

A sinner's plea

A wretched creature,
I am, I am,
Bound in my own chains.
By the devil's hands,
My soul he hungers,
To ruin me,
His venomous lies,
Poison my being.

He tempts me with lust,
A promising disguise,
To watch me fall again,
To mock my soul's cries,
Hurling self-worth,
He spits in my face,
Telling me I'm unworthy,
Of infinite grace.

I look down at my hands,
And down to my feet,
Chains I have made,
Shows a spirit of defeat,
Is his grace even big enough,
To save a sinner like me?

I look at his wrists,
And the blood-soaked tree,
My chains fell off,
My soul set free,
His look of pure love,
Seems too good to be.

For such a wretched creature,
Someone like me,
For a wretched creature,
I am, I am.

Marriage

Dysfunctional are we,
As pots of clay,
Imperfect and molded,
By the words of mere men,
That shape our wants and desires from within,
How foolish though is the man that is he,
His destiny chosen by someone's beliefs,
When he is a symphony awaiting to be played,
In perfect harmony,
To make his debut,
Each note sounded out in perfect accord to each word,
He chooses his scenery, his passion, his love,
For she fits him,
Molds to him to complete the piece,
That the one who was molding left out,
A delicate mystery of how he found her,
Her nimble hands as she sewed back,
The buttons upon his favorite tweed jacket,
Or the way her eyes seemed to glisten,
When he smiled to her before leaving the shop,
Her dark, soft hair fitting the picture perfectly,
Engraved upon his mind,
Though years it did take to find the right one,
His finishes his work, his piece,
The job is done,
And the new pot of fine clay,
Is molded with her,
And they become one.

These Warriors

The beat of the old drums echoes in my ears,
Their sound has been remodeled, refashioned,
Into gun fires and explosions,
A cynical melody,
A symphony of unnerving sound,
The play their tune upon the lives of others,
These warriors play a part of the piece too,
Walking the reddened fields,
I am struck by the sight,
Each marred face and blood soaked body,
As I continue walking on,
Their eyes still intense with their efforts & passion,
To protect their homeland but not in vain,
My searching eyes wonder at how they accomplish such a task,
Of violent brutality and heart shattering pain,
Yet they still manage to have some strength,
Down to even the very last second,
As I walk these hallowed grounds once again,
I am reminded of their selfless act,
That allows me to be standing now,
Where I am.